BE ALRIGHT - LITTLE BROTHER

i lost my black scarf from urban outfitters about a week ago. i turned my room inside out trying to find it. thought of anyone who's been in my room that could've taken it by accident. went through my roommates laundry like a perv. pretty much took my car apart. basically, i acted like it was the end of the world. guys, i even had a dream about it. haha. i won't deny the fact that i'm crazy either.

just that one small situation triggered this whole revelation in my mind.

i am a spoiled little brat.

not in the way that you're thinking referring to material goods and daddys little girl (well i am, and he does provide for me. but it's nothing extreme that would make you hate me like the girls from ss16).

i make such a big deal about things that are fucking microscopic. why did i invest a weeks worth of energy trying to figure out where my scarf was, when i should have been worrying about the fact that i haven't been to my merchandising class in a month, or the fact that these cat scratches all over my body may in fact be infected. but no, i just wanted to know where my damn scarf was. as if i don't have another one of the same exact scarf hanging in my closet. because i do, i just wanted to know where that one was.

everythings handed to me. i've always gotten what i wanted. ALL THE TIME. even from when i was little. my word always overruled sharnelles, even though she was older. what i wanted, i got. what i thought, was right. what i didn't get now, i eventually got later.

haha, it makes so much sense now. because when something isn't handed to me, and the take isn't so easy,

i go nuts.

this relates to a current situation in my life, think about it. real hard. ;)

refreshing.

anyhoo,
i also noticed that a lot of things that happen to me, are the kinds of things you see in the movies. i'd rather not go in detail for the sake of myself and a couple other parties.
but i'm just going to accept the fact that god predestined my life to be not so perfect, and hopefully at the end of all this chaos i will find "somewhere to lay my burdens" and finally catch up with time and just live (happily) in the slow lane.

til then, i'm sure i can manage. =p

and one last thing before i'm off for the night.
i need to be more careful about what i put in this blog.. it's just been brought to my attention that a lot more people read this than i thought and the story of my life already circulates through the eyes and ears of more people than i'd like..

you snoopy poopy people.

bonne nuit,

CAM